Brace Yourselves, Bros: PCH Shutdown Hits Malibu Hard
written by a member of the WCB
Listen up, fellas. Our beloved Pacific Coast Highway is about to get real unfriendly. Starting Tuesday at 3 PM, the PCH is shutting down from Chautauqua Boulevard in Los Angeles all the way to Carbon Beach Terrace in Malibu. This isn't some half-assed closure either – we're talking a full lockdown until at least Friday, February 7th.
Why the cockblock on our coastal cruising? Mother Nature's throwing a tantrum, boys. We've got not one, but two storm systems barreling towards us. The first one's hitting Tuesday night, and the second, potentially nastier one, is set to crash our party on Thursday and Friday. We're talking wind gusts up to 40 mph in the mountains. That's enough to mess up your perfectly styled hair, and more importantly, potentially trigger mudslides and debris flows.
Now, I know what you're thinking. "But bro, I've got mad driving skills!" Sorry, chief. Unless you're a first responder, recovery worker, or utility personnel, you're not getting through. CalTrans and LA County Public Works aren't messing around. They've already cleared 400 cubic yards of mud and debris from storm drains and basins. That's like, what, 40 kegs worth of dirt? Impressive.
For you Malibu High bros, here's the deal. Your school's staying open on Tuesday, but transportation's gonna be a bitch. Buses and staff are gonna have to take the long way round via the 101, 405, and 10 freeways. So if you're late to class, you've got a legit excuse this time.
Here's how to be a real MVP during this shitstorm:
1. Clear your drainage paths. No, that's not a euphemism.
2. Install sandbags. Think of it as weightlifting, but for your property.
3. Avoid burn and mountain areas during heavy rainfall. Save the extreme sports for another day, dude.
If you need sandbags or want to flex your preparedness muscles, hit up the La Costa Post Office. They're handing out free sandbags and flood risk assessments.
Remember, bros, safety first. This isn't the time to test your lifted truck's capabilities. Stay smart, stay dry, and maybe use this downtime to work on your indoor gains. The PCH will be waiting for us when the storm passes, ready for more epic sunset drives and beach parties.
Stay solid, Malibu. We'll ride this out together.