Letting Go: When Our Healing Means Walking Away
We’ve spent years trying to fix what can’t be fixed, believing that love means holding on to people and patterns that were slowly destroying us. There’s a moment in everyone’s life when we realize that some connections aren’t meant to be preserved - they’re meant to be released. It’s not about giving up; it’s about choosing ourselves.
Scripture speaks directly to our journey of letting go. Proverbs 13:20 reminds us, “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” We’ve learned that not every relationship is a blessing, and not every history deserves a future. Some people are seasons, not lifetimes. They’re lessons, not destinations.
The hardest truth we’ve had to face is that people rarely change unless they want to. We can’t pour our entire soul into someone who’s comfortable in their brokenness. It’s like trying to water a plant that’s decided it prefers to remain wilted. Our energy is better spent nurturing our own growth, our own healing.
Philippians 3:13-14 became our mantra: “But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” Letting go isn’t a sign of weakness - it’s an act of profound spiritual strength. It’s choosing our future over our past, our peace over our pain.
There’s a difference between compassion and self-destruction. Loving someone doesn’t mean allowing them to destroy our peace, our progress, our potential. Some people are toxic by nature, not by choice. And toxic people don’t get better just because we hope they will. They get better when they decide to do the work - and that’s a decision we can’t make for them.
Our journey has taught us that healing is sometimes a radical act of separation. It’s understanding that our worth isn’t determined by how much we can tolerate, but by how much we choose to protect our peace. Some bridges are meant to be burned so we can’t go back to the place that broke us. Some chapters are meant to be closed so new ones can begin.
-Deck